The Family Plan 2

The Family Plan 2 is a thing that exists, notice i didn’t call it a movie because it really isn’t one, it’s an algorithmic synecdoche of one. The film follows the continuing adventures of the morgan family (remember them, me neither) who are struggling to have a normal family Christmas after discovering used car salesman patriarch (Mark Wahlberg, who hasn’t been in sneezing distance of good material in a while) was actually a deadly assassin, when another ghost from dad’s past (Kit Harrington, slumming it) comes calling the morgan Christmas vacation becomes another action packed adventure, Queue the constant chaos and explosions in place of jokes. There is one joke in The Family Plan 2, Wahlberg’s daughter is in a relationship with a man with a french accent who calls Wahlberg daddy much to his chagrin. Did you find that funny? I sure hope so, because they repeat it 14 times. The Family Plan 2 is not a movie, it’s a machine that swallows cynicism, christmas settings, talented actors and the plots of 100 better action comedies and craps out an “entertainment product” about as enjoyable as invasive dental surgery with no anesthesia. In its own stupid way, it’s one of the most depressing and cynical movies i have ever seen and sadly just enough people will turn it on and forget to turn it off over the Thanksgiving holiday to justify a third installment. If the president gets his precious tariffs all cinema is gonna look and sound like The Family Plan 2, god help us all. 

I Give It 0 Stars!!!